WRITING

Humor Writing

For The New Yorker

Jeremy, The Last Man on Earth

The Only Kitchen Knife In Your Airbnb

For McSweeney’s

Anagrams of "Earnest Hemingway" That Could Sort Of Almost Be Titles of His Novels

Your First CSA: A Month-By-Month Guide To Enjoying Your Farm Share

For National Lampoon/Weekly Humorist

We Got You This Beautiful Charm Bracelet For Mother’s Day

Do You Need A Pep Talk?

Your Pregnancy Week By Week: Meat Lovers Edition

For The Hairpin

Unverified Uses For Essential Oils

For Slackjaw

Running Changed My Life Because I Am Getting Farther And Farther From My House

What Does Steve Bannon Look Like?

For Bullshitist

Maybe We Should Wait And See

For Janice Magazine

New Subscription Boxes For Your Subscription Box Lifestyle

For Reductress

This Woman Is Protesting The Wage Gap By Spending 23% Of Her Workday Writing Erotic Fan Fiction

Luxurious Hand Lotions That Make It Impossible To Turn Doorknobs

How Zappos Customer Service Helped Me Break Up With Ryan

Did You Know? Crate Training Your Boyfriend Actually Makes Him Feel More Secure

This Morning Skincare Routine Takes Until Your Evening Skincare Routine

Wow! This Woman Discovered Her Stretch Marks Were Really A Map To Chipotle (Headline Only)

Four Elegant Porcelain Souffle Ramekins To Eat Children's Cereal Out Of (Headline Only)

Four Super Steamy Sex Positions That Won't Dislodge Your Fitted Sheet

Wow! Woman Completes Online Clothing Review Without Mentioning Her Long Torso (Headline Only)

Quiz: You're A Bitch

Couple Agrees on Restaurant Solely Through Shrugs

Could You Be Wearing the Wrong Bra Size? Shut Up, Yes You Are

Incredible! This Woman Discovered A Scrunchie On Her Wrist After 16 Years

11 Instant Pot Recipes That Are So Fast And Easy To Stick On A Pinterest Board

Wow, Lots of Bread on Instagram Today
4 Sexy Strapless Dresses That Remind You Why Most Dresses Have Straps (Headline only)
I Keep Going Back To Him Because I Don’t Know How To Turn Off Recurring Events On My Google Calendar
4 Sex Positions That Won’t Disturb Derek’s Rescue Pugs
How To Snap A Sexy Selfie Without Stopping To Eat Sheet Cake With Your Hands
I Still Live With My Ex And Also This Wily Raccoon
How To Correctly Apply Blush, You Whore
5 Baby Names That Also Work For Ferrets, If It Comes To That

For SheKnows

The Arguments I Imagine Ina and Jeffrey Garten Have Off Camera

You Know a House Hunters Couple is Going to Break Up When...

Top Chef Challenges That I’ve Accidentally Faced in My Own Home

While Britney Spears Was Off Becoming the Pop Princess, This Is What I Was Up To

Selected Essays & Journalism

For The Advocate

Chasing The Duclod Man
Finding The Duclod Man

For The Outline

Enjoy the Show: Reality TV is Nice Now

For The Gettysburg Review

For Success Magazine

Unpleasant Task Day Is Approaching: Get Ready to Get Sh*t Done

For Montana Public Radio

For The Missoula Independent

The Real You
Encounters of the Worst Kind
The State of the Union
Pinned Up