My week-long paid vacation is over and I’m back at my office job for a final two-week run before my permanent freedom. My experimental week freelancing from home went better than I could have ever expected and all of my doubts about quitting my job are gone. Now all I have to do is get through the next ten work days without losing any morale (and while somehow working two jobs at once).
I was pretty depressed getting up this morning and returning to the regularly-scheduled program that is my crappy desk job - until I realized that I could no longer do any wrong at work. That’s right: from here on out, I am free to do what I please. I mean, what are they going to do, fire me?
With this new what-are-they-going-to-do-fire-me attitude, I slipped on my dress-code violating green Saucony sneakers, ran my fingers through my bed-head hairdo, and moseyed out the door 20 minutes late. And right now, at ten in the morning, I am sitting at my desk updating my blog and eating a pudding cup. It’s quite freeing.
And if some higher-up asks me about my inappropriate footwear or quickly-deteriorating attitude, I can say whatever I want without having to worry about the consequences. I haven’t felt this way since the last few weeks of high school before graduation - that glorious time after you’ve been accepted to college and after your GPA no longer matters.
In fact, I’m sitting here smiling right now, licking the lid of my pudding cup, thinking about all of the awesome things I could say if someone confronted me - or, rather, the one awesome thing I will say if anyone confronts me. Screw you!
I mean, sure, I’m going to try and get through these final days without an outburst. Maybe instead I’ll just smile, prop my sneakers up on the desk, offer them a chocolate vanilla swirl SnackPak, and ask them about their dreams outside of these beige cubicle walls. But it sure is nice to know the Screw you! option is there.
Also, to keep morale up until February 15, I’ll be presenting the Top Ten Things I Won’t Miss About Being A Glorified Copy Machine - one for each day I have left on the job, starting tonight.
15 comments
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February 4, 2008 at 12:08 pm
Nora Rocket
Awe. Some.
February 4, 2008 at 12:13 pm
Sarah B.
You could even…do your other job?
February 4, 2008 at 12:22 pm
Diana
Yes, ma’am!
If they say anything about your shoes just look at them snidely and say, “These are my magic kicks.”, and leave it at that.
February 4, 2008 at 1:13 pm
Robyn
I hope these last two weeks go by quickly!
February 4, 2008 at 1:22 pm
Beth from Avenue Z
Congratulations, short-timer.
As I told my friends after I put in my notice for my job at Lockheed Martin, “Sure, there’s no ‘I’ in ‘TEAM,’ but there’s sure as hell one in ‘QUIT.’”
February 4, 2008 at 1:48 pm
I.Sim
I second working on your other job while at your office job. I did it when I was leaving a position I somewhat enjoyed but was working for the spawn of Satan (which was also a publishing house) I sat at work all day long working on assignments for my night classes.
February 4, 2008 at 2:17 pm
the mother hen
I don’t even work and I’m jealous…sometimes I would love to have that attitude, but then my kids would probably revolt.
February 4, 2008 at 4:17 pm
Bipolarlawyercook
You could even leave any unconsumed pudding cups behind, in pity for the cube-bound.
February 4, 2008 at 6:44 pm
Stacey (aka Sedgehammer, Mike's Thing, and Hey You)
I saw this and thought of you. But then I was like, ‘no wait, home office isn’t REALLY unemployment.’ And then I realized I was wrong. Enjoy!
http://johnshore.wordpress.com/2008/02/04/the-five-habits-of-highly-effective-unemployed-people/
February 4, 2008 at 7:19 pm
hiptocode
are you planning on collecting any unempolyment . . . if so, you may want to act “tip-top.”
February 4, 2008 at 7:37 pm
eema
Congratulations! I hope it goes by quickly and painlessly
February 4, 2008 at 7:54 pm
Alison
I hope its painless too, but try to be nice to your bosses (even the emoticon-crazed girl) and higher-ups. You never never never know when you might work with someone future or would benefit from having them as a contact.
February 4, 2008 at 8:23 pm
sarah
Alison, hip, a few others - yes, you’re right, especially considering that my good boss wants to hire me for freelance projects right away. of course, she works off site and will not see my magic kicks (nod to diana).
I.Sim and Sarah B. - i’m trying to do too much of that, though I do work on that stuff during my lunch hour and answer client emails during the day. the problem is that i kind of promised to get a bunch of stuff done before i left. why would i promis that?!
bipolarlawyercook - i’m not sure i’m physically able to leave behind pudding.
mother hen - no, i would not suggest using my business tips to raise your kids. unless you want to get fired as their mother.
February 4, 2008 at 10:23 pm
Jess
Getting fired from a job you hate is a great feeling, so I say go for it. Wear the green sneakers. Hell, dye your hair green. Eat the pudding with your fingers and lick the lid. If you do get fired, maybe you could collect some unemployment money for the next two weeks.
February 5, 2008 at 2:27 am
Kitty
Those green Saucony sneakers rock.
So does licking the lid of the pudding while you update the blog.